Blog/ Relationships

Being Dominant or Submissive?

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This day in age it’s not rare to bump into a woman who’s all into taking charge and wearing the pants– and skirt in a relationship. Heck, I’m guilty of it. We love to be in charge, yet others don’t mind taking the backseat to their significant other being in charge of every aspect in their lives or families lives.

For those that do decide to take the backseat get scolded by other women and applauded by men. Candace Cameron was a prime example…

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Candace Cameron Bure, also known as DJ on the beloved 90’s sitcom ‘Full House,’ rubbed many feminist the wrong way when she wrote in her book that she takes a “submissive” role in her marriage with husband Valeri Bure.

As soon as that last sentence was read the twitter world went ape sh*t on poor Candace. Candace cleared up what she meant, “meaning allowing my husband to lead his family because he loves our family and [is] making the best decisions for our family that he can… to respect those decisions and encourage him to be the best man and father he can possibly be.” Okay. Understandable. I guess.

I’m definitely not against women taking on the more submissive role in their relationships. By all means! But I do think there’s an extent at which a woman should go. I’m a stay at home mom therefore, I take care of the home as in caring for Z, doing laundry, cooking, cleaning and making sure the bills are paid on time. Ny boyfriend does the male duties of going to work, paying for necessities, and being the handy man around the home.

However, we share the responsibilities– well he shares my responsibilities. He has no problem cooking once in awhile or helping around the house. Say I give Z a bath he’s responsible for cleaning up the toys and washing the dishes and vice versa. There’s no dictatorship in this household although we do fight for it sometimes.

I don’t mind taking the old-school life of living, I do kind of prefer it. Doesn’t mean I’m less of a woman in this new era of “wearing the pants.” I very much so have something to say about everythingbit even annoys me sometimes. I love to be taken care of and not have to worry or stress over a job I absolutely despise.

And I’m sure Cameron’s husband knew he hit a goldmine when he found someone who wouldn’t talk back all the time, haha. I asked my boyfriend if he would’ve wanted me to take a more submissive role and he stated he didn’t care, but life would be much simpler if I didn’t have to fight him on everything.

And I agree with him and Candace. Imagine life being easy because there’s no fights on who wants what, who wants to go where and such? Easy breezy! I’m sure if it was something harmful Candace would speak up, but why fight over where we go on vacation or what movie we watch? Hopefully, Valeri does take into account her opinion and does what she wants from time to time. I think people assume that being submissive means being gaged and not having a conversation or opinion on their lives.

I just don’t understand why she got such black lash on how she lives her life. Aren’t we allowed to live how we want? It’s not taken a step back into history just because we want to live in a home where we’re taken care of. Some women just take the whole suffrage movement to another level.

What are your thoughts? How are you living?

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