Growing up in a household where essential conversations were shrouded in silence. I found myself stumbling through the labyrinth of self-discovery, particularly when it came to understanding my body and grappling with the gravity of certain topics. Now, as a parent to a 7 and 11-year-old, I’m faced with the task of demystifying the inevitable: puberty, relationships, and all the questions that naturally arise.
So, here’s the unfiltered truth: your kids are going to grow, explore, and discover their bodies It’s our job to make sure it’s not a mystery or a taboo topic. Having learned on my own, I vowed to create an open dialogue with my kids from the get-go.
Boys Will Be Boys
Let’s talk about the infamous ‘boys and their hands’ scenario. Bless their little oblivious hearts, sometimes they need a gentle nudge. Note to self: Private time is essential. No yelling, just a casual, “Let’s keep those explorations private, okay?” It’s parenting, not rocket science.
Girls + Puberty
Now, onto the world of my daughter and puberty—a realm of curiosity, changes, and the inevitable ‘mirror moment.’ Girls, in their journey toward understanding their bodies, can’t help but be curious about what’s happening down under and what’s popping out on top. It’s a natural part of growing up, and as a mom, I’ve embraced the mirror moment. No need for secrecy or hushed tones, just an open acknowledgment that these changes are part of the beautiful journey into womanhood.
Now, let’s address the unexpected surprises. Kids will be kids, and they’ll do things that catch you off guard. Instead of losing it, I’ve found that calmly educating them and making them feel secure works wonders. No yelling, just guidance and assurance that their bodies are their own to discover. No need to overcomplicate it; just honest conversations, a comforting presence, and a reminder that, hey, you’re navigating this journey, but you’re not alone.
The Sex Talk
As we tiptoe into the realm of the ‘sex talk,’ let’s keep it as straightforward as an everyday conversation. Thanks to the informative environment at school, my kids are aware that there’s something called sex, and they’re on board with the idea that it’s a significant decision reserved for when you’re older and, of course, when you’re head over heels in love. They’re also aware that boys have sperm and girls have eggs. It’s a race between the sperm to get to the egg! Gunner and Ziana both won!
Now, the nitty-gritty details? We’re keeping that part in the ‘to-be-discussed-later’ basket. My philosophy is simple: no need to overload their young minds with the intricacies just yet. Instead, the focus is on the essence—it’s something you do when you’re truly, deeply in love, and it’s a choice that should only be made when you’re absolutely sure.
And let’s not forget the golden rule: no one, and I mean no one, should ever pressure you into making this decision. It’s your body, your choice, and the timing is entirely up to you.
To my daughter, the ongoing message is crystal clear: when you feel you’re ready, when you’re sure about it, I’m here. No judgment, no awkwardness, just a safe space for questions, concerns, and discussions. As for my son, well, it’s a simpler tune—when you’re older, and when you’re in love, you tell mommy.
Tips for Parents
For parents venturing into this uncharted territory, here are some real-life tips:
- Start Early, Like Yesterday: It’s never too early for simple conversations about bodies and boundaries.
- Keep It Real, No Mysteries Here: Bodies are amazing, and it’s okay for them to explore, but there are boundaries. Keep it straightforward, no secrets.
- Handle Surprises with Grace: Kids will surprise you. Instead of blowing up, educate them. It’s an adventure, not a catastrophe.
- The ‘Sex Talk’: Tailor your talks to their age, use words they understand, and remember, you’re not giving a TED talk, just a down-to-earth chat.
- Encourage Open Dialogue: Make it clear that questions are cool. It’s not the Spanish Inquisition; it’s parenting.
Let’s ditch the silence, embrace the awkward, and create a space where kids can grow, explore, and yes, eventually face the inevitable ‘talks’ armed with knowledge, humor, and a good dose of reality. After all, we’re all in this together.
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