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Ricki Lake is back like I said a few weeks back and last week she had an interesting topic on her show- people who were virgins. There was one woman who was 41 years old and was still a virgin. Is that crazy or what?
Ricki isn’t the first person to touch on this subject of people holding off on having premarital sex. The most popular movie, which was a comedy was, “41 Year Old Virgin.” In today’s society it’s comical to think someone is still a virgin after the age of, I would say 21- rare to say the least. These virgins have their reasons and us non-virgins always want to know why!?
I could understand a bit why people would want to stay a virgin until their married. Back when I was “saving” myself, I didn’t want to just do it because everyone else was. I didn’t care if I was looked at as an outsider. It was because I didn’t want to just give my goodies to anyone. Unfortunately, I eventually gave it up when I was 18 in college. From there I still knew not to just do it with everyone I was involved with, but I found out that sexual chemistry was very important too.
I think sex is very important in a relationship. Sex shouldn’t be the main focus in a relationship, but if you don’t have that sexual chemistry with someone, it’s bound to fail. Many relationships/marriages fail because the sexual chemistry has fizzled or is not up to par with what a partner needs.
So when someone says their a virgin because they want to wait until their married, I can’t grasp that concept very well. You never get to really know someone until you get to know them sexually. Just like when you don’t live with someone before your married. How do you know you can marry this person if you don’t know what your getting into?
I spoke to a few of my guy friends and my boyfriend and they basically said they wouldn’t want to get with a virgin. The reasons were, they can be too clingy, don’t have the patience to wait until their ready to do it and they are on different levels in life. A couple others said they would date a virgin if they saw a future.
I personally could never be with a virgin. I don’t want to wait until their ready and then when they are it’s not even something you can work with. So there I went wasting months of my life I will never get back. My two girlfriends said they would date a virgin. Reason was because they would be clean, you can train them and their expectations wouldn’t be high, haha. I asked what if the guy was bad? My friend respond “Don’t call him again!” Horrible, yet funny!
Basically, sex is good when your mentally ready to do it and are definitely an adult! If your moral compasses don’t align with the bedroom then there is a problem. I’m not saying to do it with everyone you like or think you love, but just to remember you should try out the goods before you get married.
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